Faithfully written by St. Hugh, KSC, Ignifactus of Malaria; as profoundly revealed to him by Our Lady Discordia.
1-All things have chaos as their beginning, chaos as their ending, and out of chaos they are made. And like all statements, this is neither true nor is it false. When the mind succumbs to the cocoon of order and the illusion of belief, freedom and spirit are lost and it becomes necessary to claim an identity.
2-All things have chaos as their beginning, chaos as their ending, and out of chaos they are made. And like all statements, this is neither false nor is it true. When the mind rejects the cocoon of order and the illusion of belief, freedom, spirit, and even a sense of humor are found; life can be lived.
3-In the beginning, or at the ending, or sometimes right now, it was said and will be said and is being said the most holy phrase “think for yourself!” All doctrines are heresy including this one.
4-In ancient times an ancient sage gathered together his disciples and admonished them to look after themselves for he would leave them soon. “oh, great master, please leave us with your ultimate teaching so that we can continue in your way. ” He responded “Never whistle while you’re pissing. Never believe what your hear. “
5-Romance is but another way for the cocoon of order to crush any sensitivity and to stifle any intimacy. Eros is simply a misspelling of Eris. Or at least Eros was meant as a joke; not a very funny one at that. Get romance out of the way and true love will flow.
6-Romance is but another way to break open the cocoon of order and to cultivate sensitivity where intimacy can grow. Eros is simply a misspelling of Eris. There can be no true eroticism without eristicism or at least a little discord. If Eros was originally meant as a joke then it’s gotten out of hand. Good. Cultivate romance and true love will follow.
7-Waking up from confusion does not mean that the confusion will go anywhere. Nor will laughter pay your bills. But no amount of money could ever be worth as much as laughter.
8-It has often been said that the unexamined life is not worth living. However, if one examines their life and finds no laughter, such a person can truly say that their life is worthless.
9-The maker of laughter rejoices here and rejoices in the hereafter; Thus such a person rejoices in both places. Having beheld their deeds they rejoice exceedingly.
10-The suppressor of laughter frowns here and frowns in the hereafter; Such a person frowns everywhere. Having beheld their lack of laughter they frown exceedingly. Thus it is said that the sage learns the art of tickling to wake up the dead.
11-When all the world confuses order with beauty, this in itself is ugliness. Therefore the sage instinctively walks the path and the non-path of chaos. Such a life is filled with incomparable beauty. Such a person living such a life is not afraid to worship their lovers. Such lovers learn true loving. Thus, it is often said that one way for true love to enter this world is to thoroughly confuse chaos with beauty.
12-It is often said that spiritual and religious teachings should be revered. And there are myriad ways to display reverence. But the truest most ancient most justified sages revered the heart and free thought above any teaching.
13-A squirrel was chasing a sparrow in the woods. The squirrel tripped and stumbled into a tree, losing consciousness. He awoke in a daze while the sparrow spoke thus: “these are the considerations which must be considered,
1: All violence is simply masochism.
2: Society is a joke by the general on the particular.
3: Think for yourself and believe in nothing. “
The squirrel shook off the daze but was left with a splitting headache for the rest of the day.
14-If you can hear talking animals, you may be on the way to sagehood. If you can see the fnords, you may be on the way to sagehood. If you think that government was originally a practical joke that somehow got to be taken much too seriously, you are definitely on the way to sagehood, you shameless anarchist!
15-Those who pretend to be civilized are always threatened by heresy. Those who pretend to be uncivilized are always threatened by heresy. In short, heresy is always a threat to pretentious people.
16-The two major movements or inertias of humanity are likened to cattle and sheep, but truly cattle and sheep have more intelligence.
17-The immature continuously repeat the same mistakes and call it consistency. The immature but half-awakened continuously repeat the same mistakes and call it identity. The half-immature but almost awakened repeat the same mistakes and call it by a myriad of names. The mature have no need for excuses, names, justifications, or even pseudo-pop-psychology, whether they continue repeating mistakes or not.
18-The Universe is always laughing. Is it laughing with you, or at you? The Universe is always crying, is it crying with you, or for you?
19-Those on the left will get crushed by those on the right. Those on the right will get crushed by those on the left. Those in the middle will get crushed by both sides. Meanwhile those on the top will reap the profits and will not include the rest of us in their feasts. Truly, the need for the apple of discord is great.
20-The one whose mind is not defiled by order, whose heart is not defiled by sadness, and who has seen through good and evil, is free from fear and free from obedience. Such a person is said to be fully human.
21-Days and nights slip by. Love affairs and one-nighters blur on by. Bills come by mail to be paid or neglected. Mountains crumble and new nations are born. Wars are still fought and the same stupid reasons are given. As has been said, indeed many things do come to pass, you being one of them. But when was the last time you laughed?
22-Be wary of people praying in front of liquor stores. Such people are calling upon the spirits instead of drinking them.
23-It was rumored that in response to the often quoted statement “it is an ill wind that blows no minds” the wind blowing at the time shouted “blow your own damn minds!”